crossroads

there are times when u feel u could have behaved a little better,that u could hav managed a smile somehow..U r frightened to turn back and look at ur past,all the treaden paths,some where the grass has still not grown back.u r afraid u might see something now that u had missed earlier.u feel like making a change in almost all the greyed out scenes.but alas! u cant and there strarts the difficulty,the itching in ur heart..

u become conscious while u walk thru the road alone,u have a nasty feeling inside that people are noticing u,the way u walk,the way u hav dressed and all such crap...u walk as if u dont care much,but wonder inside whether ur friends feel the same.after seeing an inspirational movie(which are very hard to come by these days) u decide on ur own that u r going to do something good and worthy for urself and for the country but u stay short of telling ur friends becos u know that they r not going to take u seriously and neither are u.u realise that the job u r doing is nowhere of wat u had thought about.u get heartbroken when u realise someday that the ones u thought were friends were more selfish than u.and then u tend up to call those old comrades whom u had comfortably forgotten for the new ones.sometimes ,very rarely, u stare out through ur window and think about ur parents,and of how lucky u r to b blessed with them..a tear rolls down ur cheek.u understand that everything else u have gained stands so small when compared with the love u ' earned' from ur mom.